I didn’t think I’d be talking about this series again. I thought the two videos would suffice, but as I began to talk more with friends who did enjoy the game, more plot problems came up than I was aware of. So guess who has to fix that mistake for this piece of crap?
And before we begin, I wanna point a few things out: I will not be addressing Chocolina. Really, I think that speaks for itself and while the plot point is dumb, it means nothing and doesn’t damage the plot. Nor will I cover Mog, or any of the combat or level design. This is strictly for story purposes. Also, MAJOR SPOILERS! If you have any interest in this game at all, and don’t want to be spoiled, then turn away now.
These are the top 11 questions I had with Final Fantasy 13-2! Why only 11? Because I wasn’t clever enough to make it 13.
11. Pulse apparently DOES have human life, but where? Yeul obviously is alive in the time Lightning and co. fight Barthandelus.
I didn’t think hard enough about this until now. The seers existed in the past, sure, but the game has multiple Yeuls alive and well. So where is the Yeul in Serah’s time period? That should mean there is in fact life on Pulse, but where? And how, considering all the monsters? This is kind of a gigantic plothole you guys have here! If life can be made down there, then there’s hardly a reason to stay up in the air! You guys are able to protect a small area decently enough. Just do that bit by bit and a civilization can be formed down there. Dangerous? Yes, but I’d rather live on the ground than in the sky, where Cocoon could fall!
Moreover, Caius win-win strategy I stated before in my old video review? Proven useless here. You see, the world already ended in the future because Cocoon fell, but Etro didn’t die from this and Caius still has to go through with his plans. And if there are other seers are on Cocoon, where the hell were they? According to some of my friends I know who are fans of this series, this was their answer: “Etro’s decisions aren’t always exactly…the smartest.”
So Etro is a friggin moron….Yeah, I can buy that.
10. “What is the point of having Serah’s bow turn into a moogle? Why not just have a moogle that doesn’t turn into a weapon?”
Okay I lied. There is one thing about Mog that bothers me. This one I didn’t think too hard on, but it does really make you raise your eyebrows when you think about this question. Was there ever a reason Mog needed to be in a fight? He doesn’t level up, so it’s not like Serah’s weapon gets any stronger. Was he the reason Serah didn’t get electrocuted when fighting against Adam?
Moreover, he is a tool for finding hidden items, throwing him for said items, etc. And notice how you can’t attack monsters on the field when you throw him? Understand the problem yet? All someone has to do is capture that moogle, and Serah’s fighting abilities are mostly gone. As you can imagine, this made one part of the game where Serah was fighting alone even more confusing since Mog was invisible and she had to use an invisible weapon. Still wondering how the hell she pulled that off. And it’s not like the two have a mental link or anything either.
You already buy and find new weapons anyway, so Mog being the bow is completely pointless. It’s actually a detriment to combat when he is already better off being the team’s support. He’s magic, I get it, but he is vulnerable too. Can you imagine if someone broke the weapon?
…What, you were expecting Mog broken in half, with his organs all out and everything!? YOU ARE A MONSTER!…Now if we were talking about most of this cast though, more understandable. Except Sazh maybe. Noel I don’t hate as much as others…yeah, only two I would save except Mog.
9. Where is the resolution with characters like Alyssa and Hope’s father?
So yeah, if you played the game, you would have noticed that there is no resolution with Alyssa at all. True, we had an earlier scene to help with her in the graveyard scared, but after betrayal, she is never seen once, not even with Hope as she vanishes. Wanna know why? It’s because of the goddamn books. Admittedly, there was also a puzzle DLC planned, but it was dropped. We know she disappears, but it’s only by reading the wikia do I get any possible context or resolution for her character. She managed to cause a rather crucial thing in the plot, so to see her dropped without anything just really shows how even the game doesn’t care about its characters. Wanna know what happened to this character? Buy a Japanese book please!
For god’s sake, books shouldn’t be crucial to figure out major events in a story! I can understand if this was taking place before certain stuff not involving the main characters, but this is major stuff! But for those curious, she teamed up with Caius because, well, she is a paradox and didn’t want to disappear since otherwise, her life would have been meaningless. It’s a shame this was cut because dying without being remembered? That’s the cruelest death I can think of. Reminds of Xion from Kingdom Hearts in a way.
As I said, there was DLC planned for this. It was scrapped however. Gee, it’s like maybe you guys should have included this kind stuff with a five minute cut-scene. As for Hope’s father, and I admit this is pretty minor, but he is never seen in the game, despite making an appearance in the first game. Still, he played an important role, if brief, and helped with Hope’s development, telling him to follow his own bath. The game only gave hints that he is a man of politics, and that he was the founder of the academy Hope is now running.
Now some of you may not even know that much. Why? Because the rest of the information is in those frigging books! They honestly even put in development for his character, at least according to what information I can find on the wikia page. Look Square, if you just want to write books, write books! At least that gives you more breathing room for your dumbass stories! Or just don’t put every ounce of detail about those characters in a book. Otherwise it does force the audience to look up the information. The reason I don’t mind the Mass Effect books is because the games focused on Shepard, and the events in the book would be far too much content to put into the games for not focusing on the character. I remind you of how short as hell and incomplete this game is!
8. Why does Lightning not question anything?
There is really no reason this character should be the focus of the first game. I already talked about her in part 2 of my review of the game, but I’ll briefly go over her. She is a poster girl for the series, but there was nothing about her that screamed absolute main character status, in the sense that the game was all about her. Hell, her story ended at the halfway point as it focused on Vanille and Fang way more.
That being said, it makes even less sense now for her to be the main star of the series, considering she was willing to throw herself after being forcefully brought to Etro’s world, and then becoming her guardian with absolutely no questions regarding the existence with the Fal’Cie, not thinking of past mistakes or the fact that this is a great time to ask it. And in the previous game, she did exactly as Barthandelus wanted, which was killing him and Orphan to destroy Cocoon. Hell, she settled on that just after her sister dies. Yes, while Sazh and Vanille didn’t know what to do, she wanted to destroy the world early; keep in mind, Sazh immediately said Cocoon was gonna die if the Sanctum died.
Fine, I can accept she was a popular character, but it couldn’t have possibly been because of her own merits, since for a supposed smart character, she constantly makes dumb decisions one after the next! She’s just a more mature version of Snow at this rate.
Yeah, I said it. And I am not taking those words back. Think about it: charges in with hardly a plan and doesn’t question anything even though she should be doing so. I can easily say, as far as all the main Final Fantasy heroes in the series, Lightning is quite possibly the weakest. And not just because of her character, but in the way her character matters and is handled within the story. Which is odd, because again, in Dissidia, she was MUCH better! Just go play Dissidia 012 for god’s sake!
7. Why can’t Caius kill himself?
It’s absolutely pointless for him to be doing any of this. I know I said he had a win win strategy, but it was otherwise pointless when he just said how destroying everything would free Yeul from her fate. And even if the only possible way was for Noel to kill him, why didn’t he just take a sword in the middle of the night and stabbed himself with it. He sure had enough force to do so when Noel was PULLING AWAY. The game had no reason to actually do this, and even fans of the series questioned this. The Guardian excuse doesn’t cut it either, since again, if that was the case, he could have killed Noel and destroy the world anyway with no problem. And yes, putting Noel and Serah into slumberland is pretty frigging pointless when the world is gonna die anyway. I get it, trying to make them happy, but only Serah gets that. Noel gets death and despair of the end of his world!
In fact, everything in this game is pointless. If Cocoon fell and ended a good chunk of life in the future, then technically it wasn’t a win win strategy come to think of it. The world already ended when Cocoon was destroyed. Caius just needed to kill himself and he wins! Why is this a problem!? Is he just against suicide or something? Or is that warrior mentality preventing him from thinking of that?
6. Why does Snow never use Shiva?
This one drove me insane when I tried to think about it. Remember the giant flan fight with Snow involved? Did you ever feel a certain set of twin were missing that could, oh I don’t know, he—
It’s Shiva! Yeah, not once during the game did he ever attempt to summon his trusty Eidolon. Sure, we see the Shiva Sisters fighting Caius in the beginning, but it’s clear they are an alternate version, similar to how Caius has an alternate Bahamut form. And for the record, it IS possible for him to summon Shiva. Why? Because in one of the game’s endings, you can clearly see him riding the motorcycle, aka the thing the Shiva Sisters transform into by scissoring each other—
But anyway, he fights the Flan alone, yet never bothers to summon Shiva. I know it was a pain in the ass to get enough energy to summon these things in game 1, but they could have put in a stronger reason than him just never using them! Hell, he could lured the giant flan away till Serah and Noel got back, leaving himself in tip top condition!
But okay, to be fair, it was technically in a jungle, so manuverability it tough. I mean it’s not like it can fly–OH WAIT! In one of the extra endings, yeah, IT CAN FLY!
5. Why did Hope say how they were free from the Fal’Cie, only to do a complete 180?
Way to be a frigging hypocrite. I honestly forgot he said this until I tried looking up clips I recorded, and it made the creation of Adam make even less sense. I understand that there are people who would want the Fal’Cie back to try and be the lucky people to live easier lives, but Hope, the one in charge going through with this idea, makes absolutely no sense.
Again, the Fal’Cie could turn people into l’Cie, and as demonstrated at the end of XIII and in this game, they could turn them into C’ieth as well! Moreover, out of everyone, Hope has witnessed first-hand at how bad things could get! And there’s no real reason provided either!
Considering the creation of robots and such, you’d think he would have found an alternate way. Actually according to what I found on the wikia, it was technically Alyssa who proposed the idea. Either way, it’s still Hope’s fault since he really knew the dangers of this! Seriously Hope, you may be smarter now, but you are still a moron.
Guess you can say…he’s The Smartest Moron! …..Well I thought it was clever.
Also, was going to include this as its own question, but I figure it bears repeating. How the hell does Serah’s weak as hell words that barely even sound like a shout manage to reach Hope in the first place!? Okay, the game explained some kinda time gate or something, but that was for Adam to cause a loop! Doubtful Hope would be there considering Adam killed him!
4. Why doesn’t Yeul do anything to stop Caius?
Ya know, I didn’t talk that much about Yeul in my review since, well, there was nothing really to talk about since she was mostly bland and her personality wasn’t really developed, especially when there are SO MANY YEULS. Yet she still tries to help Serah and Noel, even prevent them from fighting Caius temporarily just so Serah can live. But I have a question for her:
WHY THE HELL DOESN’T SHE SAY SOMETHING TO CAIUS!?
Good lord, nothing indicates that she wants the cycle to end or for Caius to destroy all life! Not once does she ever go to the asshole and say, “Listen here, you incompetent brute. I know things are painful, but mass killing everyone isn’t the goddamn solution. Go back to doing your job and buying Loreal! I’m sick and tired of you and Ganon using up the supply!” There are times I do wonder if she did want to go through with his plan, like in the time before the dream sequence thing, so that doesn’t help her little innocent angle either.
At first I thought I hated her for being bland, but no, this was the reason I didn’t even know existed until I typed this script up. Taking this a step further, she blames Lightning for what happened with Serah. While I did kind of agree, some of you probably noticed the text that stated it was Etro and Caius’ fault. In truth..YES, IT WAS THEIR FAULT! Hell, when she asks why Serah keeps stepping Caius’ way, she almost seems angry since her tone changes. So did that mean she DOES want the timeline to end?
Naturally, this segways into the next problem!
3. Why does Serah need the eyes of Etro?
No really, why? The game doesn’t give a good reason at all for this, and Lightning didn’t even know this happened. Etro apparently does this to a lot of people throughout the world. Of all the people though, why the one trying to save the world from the mess created by the damn goddess Etro in the first place? Yes, this could have been prevented had Lightning and the team did anything else other than attack Barthandelus, but they at least had the excuse of poor writing and a time limit, even though suicide is one of the more noble options. Hell, could have left a warning for the next of Barthandelus’ puppets in case he tried to do the same goddamn plan again.
However, if you think about it, it really is Etro’s fault. Ignoring the stuff with Barthandelus, has she just let Caius die in peace because he was clearly miserable and angry, or hell, had multiple Guardians, or hadn’t even let Yeul be a seeress, or anyone for that matter, he wouldn’t have tried to kill everyone, and none of this crap would be happening right now! The limit of the 1 guardian for Yeul was already pretty frigging stupid already. One man can make a difference, but they cannot always win in a fight. A team makes much more sense! Or hell, someone with a damaged psyche as your sole guardian is just asking for things to go wrong!
Etro: the reason I never want to hear the word Goddess ever again, and if I do, I may violently cut them.
And this brings me to yet another point!
2. If there can only be one Guardian, why does Noel have power, especially when he isn’t a l’Cie?
Odds are someone is probably gonna say: well, to train up the person who will have to kill Caius, as he needs to die in order for the heart of Etro to be passed on—Which technically means that Caius was lying, just realized that, since Noel doesn’t inherit the heart by game 3 since he did technically kill him, kinda sorta. Unless Lightning Returns brings up.
But then, this raises the question as to why the hell Etro couldn’t have multiple guardians, an elite force meant to protect time, and instead leaving it on the shoulders of one man. It’s clear not everyone in Pulse gains magical abilities, and if Noel doesn’t have the true power of The Guardian, then what the hell does he have that allows him to use magic and such? THIS MAKES NO SENSE! This is such an easy problem to fix too! Just make more than one frigging guardian and you’re done! Even Zordon was aware of this damn problem!
Another thing to do rather than deal with Final Fantasy XIII-2: go watch Power Rangers Time Force.
1.Why does no one react to Serah and Noel’s abilities to use magic and summon monsters?
Hey, remember how in the first game everyone was terrified of l’Cie? Well, apparently the writers did in this one, as Serah and Noel are able to use magic, and while you may not identify them as l’Cie, barring one moment, they are still similar, and yet everyone acts completely fine about it, not even one person panics or asks: “HOW ARE YOU GUYS DOING THAT!?” Not to mention you’d think someone from the Sanctum would recognize Serah and go: “Wait, weren’t you with those crazy people who nearly helped destroy Cocoon?” Oddly enough, Rosch’s reports he made apparently before kicking the bucket, somehow, managed to clear evidence against them. But that could have easily been explained in game had they just looked at the records of Serah and Lightning rather than the flimsy excuse Alyssa provides. The Guardian Corps aren’t proving to be any smarter than PSICOM.
I actually made a mistake in my review regarding the robots and the power of the military. You see, the Sanctum isn’t what it used to be. In fact, due to the Purge, the Sanctum was dismantled, and the Guardian Corps took control. What happened to PSICOM you ask, the people who had the fancy gear and monster weapons and giant robots? The only people who were fully aware of the l’Cie and had so many goddamn resources at their beck and call? They were exiled.
Some of you might think of this as a yay moment, but not so fast. Remember, yes, they did work for Barthandelus…who was posing as Dysley, the head of the Sanctum, basically the leader of Cocoon. But they didn’t know Barthandelus was doing all of this stuff to destroy Cocoon, and there were moments in the first game where even they expressed doubt in destroying an entire town. They are basically just cops!
Actually, it’s even worse than that. You see, according to what I found on a wikia, the soldiers were practically brainwashed! Without the job of protecting Cocoon, and it being the only thing they knew how to do, they went further into Pulse. These guys, who just wanted to protect their families and home, had it all taken away from them! These guys even tried helping people after the fall of Cocoon and this is the thanks they get!? When have you ever seen a straight up evil soldier in the first game?
And before you bring up Nabaat, I remind you, while she wasn’t exactly pure hearted, even she risked her life to protect Barthandelus…and was killed just so nobody would find out Barthandelus’ little secret. And yes, I am sure there are some assholes within the Sanctum that deserve some form of punishment—Hell, the congress-people denied the information put against them according to the books, but this is just going to another extreme when they were just puppets!
This is hands down, the absolute worst thing I have ever seen from this series. And you want to know the most messed up fact of all? This isn’t even in 13-2. No, it’s in THOSE GODDAMN BOOKS! In the end, these people were victims, and they punished the victims, as well as the heroes who tried their hardest to make sure Cocoon was safe, and brainwashed on top of that.
And that’s all I got. If there’s something I missed, please let me know in the comments below–
BONUS ROUND: What the hell was their plan to deal with Caius?
No really. Caius is immortal. I understand people like Lightning and Snow are unable to harm him, so an ambush with an army of people is pretty impossible. And Noel doesn’t want to kill Caius anyway, and they shouldn’t aim for his heart either or things will get much worse, aka Lightning Returns starts. So a rational idea is to just knock Caius out, right? Like overwhelm and tire him out. After all, immortality doesn’t grant one unlimited energy
Okay, then how were they going to imprison him? Once he gains that energy back, he’s going to be at full-power and ready to kill anything. I remind you he can transform into three dragons. They never bring up any ideas like this. Convince Caius? Well, the world is going to end! We are beyond talking this guy down, especially when he nearly killed Noel and Serah several times, and tried to imprison them in their own little worlds or whatever the hell that dream sequence thingy was.
And that is ultimately my problem with this series: no one thinks. No one really develops, or if they do, it’s gone in the next scene as if nothing happened. What change did we see in Snow? Nothing. What change did we see in Lightning? Aside from bowing down to a goddess without question, nothing. What change do we see in Serah and Noel? Well, Serah can kinda fight on her own but that’s about it, and even at the end, she STILL needed to be saved by Noel from a blow from Caius.
Seriously, screw this game. I’m The Smartest Moron, and just go play Radiant Historia on the DS. Trust me, that is the true Chrono successor than this mess of a game.